Splitting up
Whenever a relationship ends, there are a lot of difficult
decisions to make. Money plays a part in many of these and can
often become the focus of resentment as we attempt to untangle
lives and possessions to go our separate ways.
This section aims to help you think about the financial
implications of splitting up, whether you are getting divorced,
dissolving a civil partnership or ending a relationship with a
long-term partner. Of course, different laws apply depending on
your circumstances so if you are in any doubt, seek professional
advice – we have included some links throughout this section.
Step 1: The big decisions
How do we look after our children?
If you have children, their wellbeing is likely to be your main
concern. How you conduct yourself and the decisions you make can
have a huge impact on their future.
All parents have financial responsibility for their children.
Even if they no longer live with you once your relationship has
ended, you still have to provide for them. The financial support
you provide is known as maintenance.
Most parents try to make arrangements among themselves, deciding
who the children will live with, where they will live and how much
each parent contributes financially.
What do we do about living arrangements?
One of the main decisions you need to make when you split up
with a partner is where to live. Often one of you stays on in your
home and the other moves out but it is not always this simple.
There are a number of factors that influence who lives where once
you have split up, including:
If you were used to pooling your finances to pay for your home,
would you struggle to cover the costs alone?
Do you have a legal right to remain in the home? The law about
this can be very complicated and you will need expert legal advice.
You might qualify for legal aid.
Shelter, the housing and homelessness charity, has a lot of
information on
housing rights (link opens in a new window) and options
for people splitting up.
You can also link through to information specific to Scotland,
Wales and Northern Ireland.
If you’re concerned about the cost of accommodation, you may be
eligible for Housing Benefit
What happens to our possessions and money?
The best way to resolve what happens to any possessions and
money that you have is to come to an arrangement with your partner
about who has what. If you cannot agree, you may end up going to
court and this can get very expensive.
When you are discussing possessions and money, remember to
include:
- Savings
- Pensions
- Cars
- Your home
- Everything in your home such as furniture, electrical goods,
books and CD collections
- Your pets.
The practicalities
You need to let quite a few people know about your change in
circumstances:
- Your benefits office – this is very important because your
benefits may change
- Your tax office
- The Council Tax department at your local authority in England,
Scotland and Wales or the Rates Department in Northern Ireland
- Banks and other companies providing financial services if you
have joint accounts. Freeze the accounts if you’re concerned about
your partner withdrawing money
- Insurance providers
- Utility companies
If you have a Will, remember that you will need to change it to
reflect your new circumstances and wishes.
Step 2: Moving forward
Finding our feet once we have split up can be difficult. We
often find ourselves struggling with unfamiliar situations and
surviving on a smaller income than we are used to.
- If you need help working out how much money you have got and
how much you are spending, see the section on Budgeting. By creating a budget, you will be able
to manage your money and think about saving
- Have a look at Money Saving Tips for
help with making your money go further
- If you would like to know more about saving and investing, see
Savings
- If you need to find a job for the first time or after a break,
see Starting a Job
- If you are concerned about debts, see Managing Debt.
Step 3: Would you like to know more?
Find adviser tool.
Last updated: 27 June 2011
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